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How to handle Awkward conversations

“He who asks the questions CONTROLS the conversation”

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Awkward conversations can be frightening and uncomfortable. They may put you off speaking to people because you are not being authentic. Here are some of my tips on how to handle awkward conversations (and in some cases make them un-awakward!)

Become genuinely interested in the other person

This is my first and probably most important tip. When talking to somebody it is imperative we ask questions to find out more about them. The key to making this authentic and from a good place is to actually be interested in what they have to say. Listen intently, feel and picture their words. When you are genuinely interested in something it allows the other person to open up; they can sense your genuine energy whilst you are all the more intrigued. Have you ever noticed when interested in something you will ask many questions about it?

 

Slow down and Pauseeeee!

Whist holding conversations much of time we are so focused on what we are getting out of it, which is fine. However, this then makes us very un-grounded, and forcing lots of questions on the other person like an interrogator. Learn to pause, take a deep breath, take in what the other person has just said. Now whilst pauses may feel ever so awkward because you are eager to keep the conversation going, they are all be it a very powerful tool if used in a genuine matter. What I mean by this is; listen to the individual, and if you don’t have anything to say once they have finished the piece, then reply with the following: “Hmmm, interesting, whilst rubbing your lower face slightly”. Try it in your next conversation, it works many wonders… but be authentic!

 

Realise success comes in the amount of uncomfortable conversations you are willing to have

People often wonder what the death of success actually is. I have the answer. The reason people don’t succeed is because they are afraid to get out of their comfort zone. Becoming comfortable with being uncomfortable is key for success, and this is also the case with having conversations with people. If you like a girl, go up there speak to her, be willing to screw it all up; because guess what? Once you have done it you will realise it is not so scary after all. You will learn new things and be able to handle conversations much easier in future. Do not being fearful of awkward conversations – in fact this may sound cliche, but, strive to make at least some of your conversations… awkward.

 

BE YOURSELF

Now I am contradicting myself here, because at the top I opened with the most important tip. Well make the top tip, the now second most important tip; being yourself is by far the best thing you can do. When holding a conversation with someone BE YOURSELF. Do not try and emulate somebody and this just makes it inauthentic. What I mean by being yourself is to express how you are feeling at any given moment. Say what you genuinely want to say even if it will be ridiculed. Be true to yourself, do not lie, and trust your inner guidance. To be ourselves we must find ourselves, but one sure way of finding thyself, is to act from within as much as possible.

 

Peaccce

I hope you enjoyed these tips, have a great day, and remember, slow down, relax and be real! 

Peace and Love, BrownBoyBB. 

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The Attitude of Gratitude

“Gratitude in advance is the most powerful creative force in the universe”

Neale Donald Walsh

Look around you, look very close, you will begin to see that in today’s society many people are not grateful for what they have, as a matter of fact they behave in a totally opposite way. We live in a society where many people are complaining about their life and circumstances. A way out of this, offered by the elite is to keep attempting to make one self better, through the possession of materialistic items, however, this does not satisfy us. It actually makes us want more and thereby not appreciate what we currently have. We live in a World where a lot of us (me included) are never truly grateful for the miracle of life, and for the fact we are alive… right here, right now.

life is great

Why / How is Gratitude so powerful?!

Employing gratitude is an EXTREMELY powerful process. When you stop, reflect on life and be truly grateful for what you have your life will begin to change. You will genuinely be happy. Gone will be the days of claiming to be a happy once a future goal is reached, you can choose to be happy NOW.

Gratitude is the key to happiness. Daily practice of gratitude can ironically allow you to reach your goals faster. Ever heard the saying ‘fake it till you make it’? Well this is similar to gratitude, be happy now, be grateful now, feel how you would in your ideal life now, and guess what? One of the most important steps towards your goal is achieved. Be grateful for the flowers outside, your family helping you out, a stranger giving you way in traffic, and even for the food on your plate. Some of the most happiest people are those with nothing at all to their name. They have nothing, yet somehow, have everything.

How to practice gratitude

Practising gratitude is a very simple process and need not be complicated, however, there are many different ways to practice gratitude. Here are some of my favourites.

  • Gratitude Journal – Every day, find three new things to be grateful about and write them down in as much detail as possible. Whenever feeling ungrateful, simply refer back to your gratitude journal.

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    Here are some examples
  • Speak gratitude into existence – As you go about your day, attempt to notice as many things to be grateful for as possible. When you see something, marvel at it, do not judge it, simply be grateful for its beauty, and say it out loud.

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    How beautiful
  • Give more thanks – Saying thank you is one, if not the most powerful form of gratitude you can employ. Say thank you for everything. For your life, for the postman delivering you valuable letters, your mother for her home-cooked foods. Say thank you more, and you will receive more.

I am

Lastly, attempt to always see life with the attitude of gratitude. Be genuinely grateful, and you will be happy, I guarantee it.

Thank you for reading this article. Read more on these topics

Truth about Happiness

The Beauty Of Giving

How To Continually Grow Stronger In A Negative World

thankyou

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The real reason why I train (and why you should too!)

The pain of training, spewing your guts all over the floor, or the pleasure of training doing what you find fun… which one to do? More importantly, which one resonates with you?

Pain

Pain comes part and parcel with training there is no escaping it, however, what defines pain?

The training style I love to partake in is bodybuilding, and have been training for around 8 months. There are many different ways to train, but I prefer a mix of controlled, heavy to start and then finishing the workout with high-rep (burnout) pumps.The thing is it hurts, but there is something about the pain that I love (call me crazy). Now if i was to go crazy and force myself to do things I did not want to do (like 10 sets of hack squats!) then that would be pain I do not like, and guess what? It won’t grant me results. Forcing yourself do something you really hate will eventually have its toll. This means it is important you define really what kind of pain you are willing to endure.

 

 

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If you give up at the first hurdle of pain, you have lost out on lots of upcoming pleasure

Pleasure

Often after reaching the end of a good, hard training session, comes those endorphin’s, that amazing feeling of pleasure.

Have you ever realised that after giving it your all and leaving everything out there (under that Barbell) that you will come out of the gym with one of the best high’s ever known to man?

They say with pain comes pleasure, and this is certainly the case with bodybuilding. You put in the work, you endure pain, you see results, and this motivates you to keep going, thereby facing the pain yet again. Like i said, with pain comes pleasure, intense pleasure.

 

 

Pleasure.jpg
Arnold Schwarzenegger sums it up perfectly

So.. how should YOU train?

Now we arrive at the most important part of the article, how should I as an individual train?

Well firstly it depends on what you are training for, an athlete training for a marathon will be training much differently to that of a sprinter. However, what ever form of training you do, you MUST find a way to enjoy it. The most successful athletes in life are those who do what they love and therefore work extremely hard towards that particular endeavour. what they love, because they work extremely hard towards that particular endeavour.

So remember guys, train hard and enjoy the pain by doing what you love!

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